Apr 30, 2013
Bad Kitty, Good Kitty
Prologue: D&B are a modern couple living in London. They have been together for three years and they share a flat in Angel. Speaking of having a baby, they decide to get a pet to test their parent skills first. And this is how Tongue becomes part of the family, on a chilly early winter morning.
Opening incident: D&B buy all the cat accessories that a keen shop assistant advice them to get. Tongue doesn't show any interest in his new house and possessions, hiding behind the CD rack and trembling like a leaf in the wind.
Inciting incident: the next morning D&B awake to a post nuclear war scene in their living room. Tongue has destroyed everything that could not be eaten or thrown out the window. D cries and B promise her to fix the situation.
1st complication: D&B go to work and B go back early to clean up before D comes home. Tongue behaves as a little gentleman and purrs every time B touches him. D comes home to find the house clean and Tongue sitting on the couch with B. D sits on the couch but Tongue goes mental with fury and B has to carry Tongue out of the room and cuddle him until he calms down.
2nd complication: In the next few days appears more and more obvious that the evil Tongue is trying to take D's place in B's heart and his evil plan is working. D cries and B defends Tongue saying D is hallucinating, Tongue is just a kitten.
3rd complication: D&B take Tongue to the veterinary clinic for vaccinations and check up. It turns out that Tongue is a lady kitten after all. D&B celebrate taking Tongue to the pet shop where they buy enough pink and fluffy toys to last for a life time.
4th complication: D is home from work one morning. After B kisses her goodbye and leaves she has a shower and she comes back to the living room to find a disaster. Tongue has destroyed all of B's shoes, purses and clothes. D finds a poo on her picture frame showing her and B hugging and laughing. D goes mental and locks Tongue in the broom closet.
5th complication: B comes home to find D in tears and Tongue crazy from being locked all day in the closet. He's furious at D and threatens her to leave her.
6th complication: D&B go on holiday, leaving Tongue to D's mom. They get a cheap flight to Lisbon and enjoy a night strolling the bar district in Belem. D gets a phone call on her mobile. It's her mom, crying, saying Tongue had an accident and is barely alive.
7th complication: D&B get on the first flight home and run to the veterinary clinic, where Tongue is dead. D feels guiltily happy about it and B is outraged by her cruelty. That night, B sleeps on the couch. D cries herself to sleep.
8th complication: D gets an other kitten home, Tuna. She puts a blue ribbon around the pet's tiny head and prepares the best meal ever. B doesn't go home that night. The kitten purrs and cuddle D crying until she falls asleep.
9th complication: B phones D asking to leave the apartment for a few hours so he can get his stuff and move out. D goes to her mother. B goes in and finds Tuna purring around his legs.
Climax: B is incapable of resisting Tuna's sweetness and when D comes home B is sitting on the couch cuddling the kitten. D cries and runs in his arms and begs him to come home.
Resolution: B comes back home and marries D and Tuna carries the wedding rings on his collar. And they lived happily ever after.
By Lisa Agosti